


Definitely The Sun

by AshenLucith



Category: Inazuma Eleven
Genre: Childhood Friends, Crush, Drama, F/F, Romance, Transgender, Transphobia, Transwoman, Umbrella, day 6: umbrella, domestic girlfriends, first person POV, sapphic Barra, sapphic week, trans experiences, trans!Burn, transfemme!Burn, transphobia of the soccer world that is, wlw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:34:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26320477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshenLucith/pseuds/AshenLucith
Summary: “There was this different kind of warmness that you emit. I wish I knew more of how to make you show me more of that.”transfemme!Burn X Barazono Hana (Barra)
Relationships: Nagumo Haruya | Burn & Suzuno Fuusuke | Gazel, Nagumo Haruya | Burn/Barazono Hana | Barra, Suzuno Fuusuke | Gazel & Barazono Hana | Barra





	Definitely The Sun

**Author's Note:**

> Writing a first person POV isn’t something I usually do but I wanted to explore what I think Barra’s personality could be with the most intimacy with the character as possible.
> 
> Must I always write the aliea kids being sad jsksbskssh
> 
> Again, thanking @/fiat_luz for inazuma sapphic week and accepting my late entries. It tears me up aaaaaaaaa I hate being busy.
> 
> Inazuma Sapphic Day 6: Umbrella

“What if we’re aliens instead?!! The neighbors wouldn’t ask me to not wear a skirt anymore, right?!”

It was a conversation I couldn’t forget. We were eight and trying to make sense of our little world. We were always talked down by the neighbors’ kids whenever we went outside. They always ask for our parents, they always make fun of us for saying that a single man is the only one we can call as such. The neighbors won’t allow us to be happy with what we want to do, they mock us with what we like doing, they think nothing of us but think about us a lot at the same time.

“If we’re aliens, we can wear whatever we want!! And we can own pink or blue things!!”

You were so joyful that your own red fluffy spikes bounced on your head as you talked. You twirled and spun as the violet skirt you borrowed from me flew with your every move. You were every bit as happy. You were every bit as energetic and loud. You were beautiful.

* * *

“I’ll… I may need to go to the toilet first haha.”

Four years later, you didn’t seem as happy.

You were still cheerful but I see the glint of sorrow in your yellow and black eyes. You always hid from us, you always ran somewhere whenever it’s time for the routined shared bath with the boys. There have always been shared baths but it was only recently when you started missing them all the time. Fuusuke would always end up being told to look for you. I always help him and hear him complain. You were impossible to be found. I should’ve realized back then that you didn’t want to be seen.

I should’ve realized you were hiding you.

* * *

“You should take care of your skin more.”

A year later, we were studying in a public middle school. You caught up to me as I was walking to the trinket store again as the sun was directly above me. We only had half day in class due to some event I couldn’t remember. It couldn’t be helped that I didn’t have an umbrella with me. I never actually bring one. And then you put an umbrella over my head even though I didn’t ask. But the gesture was appreciated. It made me ask myself why Fuusuke hated you if you were actually this nice.

You simply chuckled.

* * *

“He’s my rival.”

I didn’t understand rivalry. The concept of competition was somehow comprehensible but did it only need to be one person everytime? I told you about my confusion. I shouldn’t have voiced out the rest of my thoughts.

“Must be a boy’s thing.”

I saw the way your breath hitch, being only a shoulder’s distance from you. You must have felt awful that time. You must have been hurt.

“Haha… yeah.”

You tried to hide it. The way your voice was lower than usual was telling of it. I tried to forget the look you made for a moment as you stared straight down the street where the neighbors lie. Where your nightmares have faces and where your reality seemed blurred.

I heard you breathe heavier than usual and then you took my hand and placed the umbrella’s handle there.

“I remembered I have something else to do! Keep this for me!”

Your red umbrella stayed with me but the dashing red figure I saw running could only get farther.

* * *

“Burn!! Burn! I want you all to call me Burn!”

Another year passed and I’ve seen you smile again. It made my day to see you finally regain your energy. You were shining. Your energy were as dazzling as the sun. You loved being called Burn. I didn’t know why but you loved that so much. You never told anyone why even though they’ve asked.

Something happened with you and Fuusuke. I was glad to eventually see the two of you set your differences aside and merge the teams. I was glad to see you. I was glad to play with you. I was glad to talk to you. I was glad you were even more you than I remember. I was glad we’ve become closer. What I wasn’t so glad about it is seeing you look at Fuusuke when you know he wasn’t looking. I went to my room and hugged the umbrella you gave me that time.

I should really give it back.

* * *

“I have something to tell you.”

Your time with Red Dragon brought you back to us with more maturity than we remember you to have. You continued to grow now that we’re a year away from high school.

“That you like Fuusuke?”

“What?! No! Definitely not!”

I wasn’t there to judge you nor tease you about it. Everybody could tell. I didn’t have control of my mouth. I didn’t know why I suddenly dropped that bomb. I guess I was insecure.

“It’s really not that, I promise.”

I believed you.

“This will sound weird.”

I let you continue.

“I don’t think I’m a… well. Is it normal to think you’re not a guy?”

I was stunned. I couldn’t think of a way to respond. Despite my eyewear, you knew I was shocked.

“I know! I know it’s weird. But!! I—”

I squeezed your shoulder.

“I believe you, Burn”

The smile you gave me was different than the one you’ve always had. Instead of the mischievous smirk or an elated grin, you gave me a teary-eyed one. You sniffed and wiped your arm and hand all over your face as you deny crying.

Good for you.

* * *

“They wouldn’t allow me to play if I do.”

We were in our last year of high school and there was a thrill in your voice as you shook at your worry.

“I wouldn’t be able to play anymore. I wouldn’t be able to play against Suzuno’s team.”

Your whole body was shaking as you thought about being deprived of what made you happy the most. Transition already wasn’t a simply thing on its own but to pair that with not being able to do what you’ve always loved to do— to compete and play soccer— everything was torture.

You sobbed and wept, and I stayed with you that night— that week. All you wanted was to be yourself, to get closer to how you see yourself. Why did that have to take away soccer from you?

* * *

“At least I can still play with you.”

You danced with the ball as you’ve always had. I saw you face some difficult times. The medication brought out the worst of you at times but you would always apologize after. You’d make it up to me. I understood. Transitioning wasn’t easy but seeing you both different and the same now five years later was worth it. You’ve become happier. A truer face of happiness.

* * *

“It wasn’t a crush. It was jealousy.”

I couldn’t tell why it took time but it was two years more before we admitted to one another that we've always been in love and of course, I couldn’t help but ask you regarding Fuusuke.

“He was always so confident, especially with his body. It was something I never had back then.”

The way you admitted it while you’re already sure of yourself put a smile on my face.

“Are you sure you didn’t like him? Not even a little bit?”

I tried to tease you. I knew it wouldn’t work.

“Well. I may or may not have thought it was a crush… I was pretty amazed at him. Still am.”

You saw my eyebrow connect and you laughed at me. To throw the teasing back to me, typical Burn.

“Ma’am, you get a yellow card for uncalled for teasing.”

You chucked and I joined you. You really are as bright as the sun, Queen.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m always gonna be angry about the fact that there’s still people who think it’s unfair for trans people to participate in sports. I’m glad some countries are getting progressive about it but CAN WE NOT?!?! Anyway, I’ll leave the rants on my socmed accounts lmao.
> 
> I’m still not done with my reading of how trans people want to be written so please if you’re trans and you find this offensive please tell me immediately! I’ll only listen to trans people (esp those who’ve undergone/are undergoing transition) regarding this btw!
> 
> When it comes to the technicalities of writing, I always welcome criticisms from anyone. Feel free to do so please!


End file.
